The end of our relationship began at the start....

So, what was the real reason J wasn't ready to move forward in December?  Apparently, he had never dealt with my folks thinking he wasn't a good match for me.  He spent all that time the first year trying to console me and doing things to help bolster his case.  When he started counseling right after we broke up, he figured this out pretty quick.  He rediscovered how much he wants to get married and have kids.  He seems ready to go forward now, pending telling my folks.  I do need to ask him next time I get a chance if he really feels like he's worked through this...because my parents are going to have an even worse opinion of him being a good match for me now!  He's got to be OK with it...otherwise this is all for nothing.

Another reason, was that he felt everything was just moving ahead without him.  Out of the blue last spring I bought a house only after 2 weeks of deciding to do so.  I tried to include him as much as possible, and I could tell he was out of sorts from the beginning of that.  However, I thought we got things sorted out when I reaffirmed that I didn't need help from him to pay the mortgage.  My folks also helped me with the down payment so that my mortgage would be lower.  He took this as them saying that he couldn't help me, so they always would....basically that he couldn't provide - although we weren't even engaged yet.

Then my mom started working on planning the wedding in September....which is when we were starting to have visible problem and had hit a stall.  That didn't help anything.